Matrimony Moments & Mishaps That Made Our Day
Sharing some Wedding-Week Wisdom: What We’d Do Differently (and What We’d Do Again, Ten Times Over)
I can’t explain how quickly your world-view changes the moment you slip a ring on your finger—like flipping the switch from the longest “someday” of your life to all-in bridal mode overnight. After almost seven years together, once Emory and I got engaged, I wanted to celebrate soon, and suddenly wedding planning became a hobby, obsession, and personal challenge all in one. But here’s the thing—I wasn’t interested in just pretty pictures or Pinterest board checklists. I wanted a day (or weekend, really) that overflowed with memories, connection, and those once-in-a-lifetime feels.
Why Quality Time Was Our Non-Negotiable
One of my biggest wedding pet peeves? The thought of our friends and family traveling miles (sometimes states!) just to spend two minutes in a receiving line before disappearing into the crowd. I’ve always felt that the best gatherings are the ones with actual connection—a hug, a laugh, even a heart-to-heart in the kitchen at midnight. So every bit of my planning revolved around making sure our guests felt special, included, and truly present for every moment.
(If you’re like me, I highly recommend The Art of Gathering by Priya Parker. I didn’t actually finish it during wedding planning—but even the few chapters I did read were totally worth it, especially when it came time to edit the guest list!)
We stretched the party into a whole weekend and invited our closest friends to stay with us—so instead of “Hi!” and “Bye!” on repeat, I got real, honest conversations, last-minute pep talks, and the kind of memories you can’t schedule on any venue’s timeline.
Picking the Date, Choosing the Spot
We were set on a fall wedding—the weather, the Midwest colors, the energy of a new season—but having gotten engaged in the fall, we had two options: rush the planning (with less than a year) or wait almost two years. I knew myself well enough: I couldn’t stomach waiting that long and the amount of times I’d replan the entire wedding during a 2 year duration-yikes! After some soul-searching and spreadsheet budgeting chaos, we dove headfirst into the madness.
Going with Raspberry Hill Bed & Breakfast—a dreamy Tudor-style house tucked into prairie grasses and surrounded by woods—wasn’t actually my original dream location. It is, however, exactly the style of home I always imagined for myself (and funny enough, what Emory and I now call home). Sometimes, what you think is “the dream” doesn’t line up with your real priorities or your budget. We chose this venue for its natural beauty and because we got the whole place (house included!) from Thursday to Monday. That meant more quality time, more space to set up and unwind, and a total ‘destination’ vibe... even though we were just twelve minutes from our front door.
Advice: Pick a venue and date that feels right emotionally, as well as logistically. And consider comfort and go back to the experience you’re trying to create—sometimes “easy to get to” means more laughs, more hugs, and less time spent lost in traffic.
Building a “Guest Experience” Timeline
I could do a whole post on this topic alone (and maybe i will?) Instead of piecing together traditional steps, I made lists: How did I want us to feel at every turn? How should our guests feel—engaged, welcomed, relaxed, like they’re part of a family reunion? That vision shaped everything. We scrapped traditions that didn’t fit. We planned multiple group events: bonfires, brunch, evening cocktails, and multiple dance parties.
What worked best was having friends close, delegating the little stuff, and prioritizing interactive moments—like guest speeches, photo ops, communal games, and time in shared spaces.
Advice: Build your schedule backward from “the vibe” you want, not from Pinterest. Focus on maximum quality time, mix guests up at every event, and provide plenty of places for conversations to happen naturally.
The Moments & Mishaps That Made Us Laugh (and Cry)
The Heat: It was 95 degrees…in the middle of September… (goes to show that there is NO safe day in the Midwest) and everyone was melting—including the antique chairs. Sure, some shirts were ruined, but it made shady corners and cool breezes precious, and the sun was absolute magic for helping set the vibes.
Brothers & Unexpected Support: My brother, who I rarely see eye-to-eye with, showed up all weekend—helping, supporting, even stealing the show with his unexpected, emotional speech. Give people space to be the hero; you might just be surprised.
Purse Panic & Sleepover Blues: I tried the “don’t see the bride before the wedding” tradition and it backfired—lost purse, freezing night, and way more stress than necessary. If you need your partner to feel grounded, skip the superstition and have that special moment.
Advice: Let go of perfect—expect hiccups, awkward moments, and a little mess. That’s life, and why should your wedding be any different? Feel it all: the good, the wild, the ‘oops.’ And remember to breathe and soak it in; those are usually the memories that stick.
Anchoring the Emotion
It’s overwhelming, honestly: so many happy tears, the laughter that snuck up on me, nerves that could have ruined a moment if I’d let them. The only way through was to carve out private, quiet time just for Emory and me—to let go, trust the people we’d chosen to handle the details, and stay present. That decision to prioritize us first (and emotion above everything) shaped every second.
Advice: Start every planning session with a feeling, not a checklist. Be true to yourself, then think of your guests, and let everything else fall into place.
What Photos Can’t Capture
The biggest thing? Just how much every guest meant to us—having them all present together, witnessing our story, was beyond words. No photo can fully express those quiet moments of gratitude, connection, and the feeling of getting to share our home and our love with our closest friends and family.
What’s your wedding pet peeve or favorite mishap that turned into a win? Comment below if you’d like to share your best guest experience ideas, planning tips, or moments that made your day uniquely yours. Let’s celebrate the messy, beautiful, perfectly imperfect reality of weddings!